?

Log in

No account? Create an account

Walkin' With God

2008 was insane.
It was the craziest year of my life.
 

There was a lot of good times, and a hell of a lot of bad times, but it's interesting to note what was in the middle of all of this: Jesus. On June 21, halfway through '08, I got baptized and decided to begin to walk with the Lord in this thing they call, "Christianity." And I can say without a doubt that becoming a Christian, a follower of Christ, has been the most life-changing decision of my entire life.

I can see it so clearly, even now, the difference in how I behave now after transitioning to a Christian lifestyle in comparison to "B.C." days. I loved to party, drink alcohol, even though I couldn't stand the taste of it (though I did develop an affinity for Coors Light :P).
 


I was essentially a pleasure seeker, if you were to ask me my life philosophy. Not that there's anything wrong with doing what you like...but to excess...not so good. I treated life like a game, without care of responsibility or consequence. Life was a party. And then...

It came to a 'screeching halt' quite literally when I got into my car accident...before I had my license! 'Twas really bad. I took out a light pole.
 
That's what my car looked like. Except there was an engine.
 
Oh yeah, and that was the day of my baptism. I was really sleepy, and I woke up with smoke and nauseous. The engine was revving and I was like, "I'm not pressing anything, shut up!" But yeah the light pole fell into this guy's yard, he was yelling at me.

I thank God for giving me a sense of peace...and humbling me in a HUGE way. That sobered me up big time. I mean, I could've died. Like the electricity running through the light pole could've started a fire, my engine was like full on like messed up, it could've exploded or something. Yowza. I get anxious thinking about it.

Things are a bit different now...not as 'crazy' or 'interesting,' but I like it better than how it was before. Not so much a party, as a book: there's different chapters...sometimes things aren't being written...okay now I'm borderline-emo-poetry rambling.
FEAR THE CONFEDERACY OF FLAPPING BOOKS!


If there's any New Year's resolution I would want to make, I think it would be to resolve to walk with God, not run or crawl. It's been...a marathon to say the least. Wow, another metaphor for life haha. It hasn't been easy, is what I'm saying.
 
Look, she's worshiping God...and winning a marathon.
 
There have been moments of doubt, of loss, of "Dude, God, what the bleep are you doing?" or "Can't You, of all people, stop this?? STOP IT BLARGH!!!" It goes without saying, the intellectual part and spiritual part of me is hard to reconcile. I think though, what God is telling me, above anything else, is

"Obey."

Simple things, really, like cleaning my room, or helping around the house. Buy things you can afford. Make sure my friends are okay. Be patient with others. Love self, love what you do, love others; putting love in action. And get done whatever needs to get done. As Jesus says in John 15:12 "'This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.'" In being a Christian, there needs to be an understanding of not only believing, not only having faith, but also actually doing what Jesus commanded: to love God, love others (like yourself) and to share the Gospel, that Jesus died for the forgiveness of sins and rose again, ensuring eternal life for all who ask for it.

Simply imagine how ridiculously incredible Jesus' brand of love is. Love your family. Love your friends. Love your enemies. Love anyone and everyone, indiscriminately. And now understand how life-changing it is when you put it into action. So thank you for all my friends and family who love me, and who have taught me what love means. I love you and thank God for allowing you to be a part of my...marathon, book, video game level, life :)
 
Love thy puppies.


Everyone's heard about the loving. But what about the humble?
 
I almost bought this book. I may still.


I recently read an article in Christianity Today entitled, "The Advent of Humility," by Tim Keller, pastor of Redeemer Presbyterian Church in Manhattan, New York, and author of the "The Reason for God." The tagline reads,

"Jesus is the reason to stop concentrating on ourselves."

Keller contends humility is a distinguishing characteristic of the Christian amongst the moral, or supposed moral of today, and that perhaps the meaning of meekness needs to be revisited to give the secular world a new view of Christianity, besides heated, judgmental Pharisees. The part that really got me was this part: 'Christian humility is not thinking less of yourself; it is thinking of yourself less, as C. S. Lewis so memorably said. It is to be no longer always noticing yourself and how you are doing and how you are being treated. It is "blessed self-forgetfulness."'

I think this "blessed self-forgetfulness" is needed today more than ever in this era of ME.

MY stuff, MY music,
MY reputation, MY girlfriend/boyfriend,
MY etc.

Selfishness and pride play so deceitfully in OUR world...when this is all really HIS. And perhaps with a life more focused on God, serving others through what we're skilled at, in humility and in love, this world can be a little better.

END MONSTER EPIC EXPECTED TO COME NOTE.

peace&love

How will you exercise your free will?

God is real, and He is waiting for you to allow Him to be an active participant in your life!

God graced every one of us with this thing called

>>>>>>>>>>>>FREE WILL<<<<<<<<<<<<

Hence, we have the freedom to choose what we do with our life (i.e. what to eat, when to play, who to vote for, etc.).

+Whether to do what is expected or you, or do what you want to do.
+Whether to do what is good, or do what is bad.
+Whether to follow God, or follow sin.

As I see it, in every decision you make there will always be one option that is good, and one that is bad.

God trusts and loves us so much that He allows us to make our own decisions.  He doesn't force us to love Him.


*God is incompatible with sin, as He is a deity, right?  Perfect, all-knowing, all-powerful.  And completely HOLY.  Bad things don't mix with good things, like oil and water.

No matter what we do, we can never be perfect.  The Bible talks about how we are all sinful, that none of us are worthy.  But through the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ, the power of sin and bad stuff over our lives has been karate-chopped and defeated! 

Through Jesus, we are forgiven of our sins, and all we need do is be upfront and real with God, and be like, "Hey God, yeah I know I'm just human.  I'm sorry about..."

How much more can we humans do with the King of all Kings on our side, yo?   SHAZAAM!


When it comes down to it, I was just thinking, what in this crazy, chaotic world can we really control, save ourselves?  If such is the case, why not then consciously go out and love one another?  That's the greatest thing in the world, I think.

I believe that God gave each of us a purpose and a map of our lives filled with awesome jobs and a perfect spouse and family etc., but how you choose to get to each of these things is up to you.

Remember, God is waiting to help you.  All you gotta do is ask.  All it takes is a leap of faith, and a simple prayer.  I challenge you to talk to God, even if you don't believe in Him.  You do, after all, have a choice.  So...

How will you exercise your free will?

epic fail. morality&truth. where's God?

When we sin, we fail;  we displease God. 
Then there's that whole guilt trip to Uji-town.









This is what God feels like on your way to Uji-town.


I'm going to be transparent, because I've noticed that I try to seek truth in a world dressed in sheep's clothing.  And looking into the mirror, rarely do I admit or uphold the virtue of honesty.

I've failed in a bunch of areas, with relationships, dishonesty, anger, bitterness, depression, empty promises, etc. but I think the one thing I have failed at time and time again is with this phenomenon some would call "pornography."  As God as my witness, I testify that I've been plagued by it for years, like probably 8 or something like that.  In high school, I was addicted. 

I felt like it was the only thing that made me feel better. 
And the only thing going through my mind was "feel good, feel good."

Today was an epic fail in that area again.
But today, something interesting took place.  I found no pleasure in it.  I didn't enjoy it.

Funny, how God is able to take something bad and grows something good out of it.

It's compelling for me...for someone who once believed in nothing...and now I believe in something...the real-est something I've ever experienced.

It's definitely inexplicable...God, I mean...Like when you watch a really good movie, and after it's done, you have that moment as the credits roll, and you sigh, and you think to yourself, "why can't every movie be like that?"


Watch it!


It didn't just feel good, you just knew it was good.  And when you're friends agree with you too, and it wins a bunch of awards, you're like, "I KNEW IT!"

In the same way, I know and believe that there is truth in this world.  And nothing comes close to the reality of God in my life.  It's the greatest feeling in the world.

The difference between the God stuff and the porn stuff, for example, is the porn stuff is like

"hey.aurrite.yessss  i feel like doin that.  hehe."

but with God, it's like

"hmm church.  idk, im tired."

Bad stuff is easy, and admittedly, fun to do.  With God, I feel so at peace, and so happy, so sad, and so passionate and so alive at the same time, but it's not easy. 

It's a choice I'm faced with every single waking moment of my life: to follow God, or to follow sin.

When things get boiled down to it, there are always going to be those two options: to do what is good, or to do what is bad.
 




 

********************************theology break!**************************************************






US=Beings with conscience.  Who make choices.



SIN=Bad stuff.  Messed up things we do. Separates US from God.
________             ________________
                \JESUS/
=Dude who died for our sins.  Brings us to God.



GOD=Good stuff.  Holy and pure, incompatible with bad stuff.

See how we're separated from God by sin?  Jesus is kind of like the sin filter.  But the destiny of Jesus was to die for our sins, and to prove it he rose from the dead three days later.  Isn't that great?

"Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one's life for his friends."
-John 15:13 NKJV


What greater love is there than self-sacrifice?

Even if you don't believe in Jesus, I want to challenge you to digest that concept of sacrifice.  What is love?  Who is Jesus?  And what did he really say?

   
Buddy Jesus.  The Man!  My Lord and Savior!   
Huzzah!







**************************************end break**********************************************************








I believe in truth.  I believe in destiny.
I believe in purpose, and a reason to everything.

It's a matter of finding it.

In that same manner, as the Catholic Saint Ignatius of Loyola taught, we must look for God in all things.  He is all-powerful, ever-present, and most importantly, his love endures forever.  Remember, God loves you.

Peace,
Sean.

chaos. a prophecy for me. identity.

I've been meaning to write for awhile now.  But I couldn't think of anything to write about... 

...anything interesting, at least.

Right now, I was just reflecting, because I felt really compelled to write about something, immediately, or I felt like I would explode.  Thus, I was brainstorming some sort of imagery to use in the blog.  A metaphor, or something.  Those things are used SUPER well in church.  So...now it's awkward that I mention even thinking about that.

Umm.  Lookee here.


I feel like the toilet's clogged, and now there's crap running rampant on the stage of my life.  I don't mean to be melodramatic, but at 1 in the morning, you have to make do with the little subtlety you're graced by.

My mind has been taking an aerobic test for too long, my body is Hitler-izing my every move, and my spirit keeps stalling on me.

It's chaos!

And I think many other people are going through some chaotic times as well.  Socially, in the family, at work, economically, relationship-y, etc.

I'm here to say that there is hope.  That bad things are just as fleeting as good things.  They don't last forever.
Is that even encouraging?  :P

Encouraging=being prophecy-ed over on Saturday.  I'll go into greater detail later.


Oi!  I got me a prophecy!

But basically, the point is, these two people who I've never really talked to before or know personally told me all these things about me that are true...

How I'm analytical.  Too much so.
How I get frustrated too often.
And how I write music and poetry.

And how I need to let go, and let God work through me.
And how I need to focus on what matters, and remind myself that I have a destiny and purpose.
And how I need to be aware of how I impact others, now, and in the future, musically.



The crazy thing is that playing piano, worshiping God, leading worship...this is what I'm called to do.  This is what I'm meant to do.  I have a gift, and I never even realized it.  I always took playing piano for granted, but now it's become ten times more serious.

I have an effect on people, in how I play the piano.  With their emotions. 
I can bring people to peace
I can bring people to truth, justice
To sing, dance;
I can bring people to cry
To shout, to laugh, to love...to feel.

Most importantly, I can bring people to God.

This whole Jesus thing, this whole Pentecostal angels and demons thing, this whole Christianity thing...it's the truest  ANY thing I've ever experienced. 



And for once in my life, I have an unshakable peace.
I feel loved and accepted.
I feel like I belong.

And yet there's the chaos.

But nothing matters, because I know who I am.  I'm Sean.
And that's mines for keeps.

faith in progress

Nowadays, I don't think I get enough time to just REFLECT.

So I'll do that now.

Reflecting now, I'm coming to the conclusion I don't get to just talk story with people I care about as much as I want to.  So I've concluded that through reflecting now I don't reflect enough.

Great.

But seriously, I used to get to do that every Thursday with my small group buddies from GBC.  what what, represent!

Now there's hardly any time.

But Patrick told me something today that stuck with me.

"Make time."

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

Today I'm going to process this idea of Faith.  The idea of believing in something that you are not sure of will happen, or exists etc.  Like, for example, believing in an all-powerful, all-knowing, and all-loving God with no proof to prove it.

From my experience, faith has had a lot to do with this word called Attitude.  I find it suitable to bring up the fact that my choice to label myself an Atheist was the result of a half-a-year existential crisis.  It began with a simple question,

"What is the meaning of life?" 


This slowly formulated, by the doom of pure logic, into the answer,

"There is none." 

I went from slightly unstable to intensely negative.  That word, "none" just shouts bad, it almost bleeds emptiness.

Looking back, those were the darkest days of my life.  I found little enjoyment in anything, preferred to distract myself with having fun all the time, and found no lasting satisfaction in anything.  And I quickly identified the problem:

I had chosen to abandon the concept of religion.

The very idea was contrary to my very soul, it fought against my very nature of who I know who I am.

I was basically fighting myself...I cannot describe it with a metaphor.

It's like that feeling you get when you aren't doing anything, and you feel like you've got a puka in your spirit, even though everything's okay.


That's a big reason I have faith in, and trust in, God, I suppose.  Because if you think, like, if everything in this world is imperfect, but God is, then why not rely on the thing that's supposed to be perfect, and see what happens?

And as they say, our God is a faithful one.  He gets things done.

It is written that our faith overcomes the world.  In the same spirit, like those posters say on middle school bulletin boards, "Attitude is everything."  How we approach a situation totally changes everything.

I'm going to tell a story detailing that.  So...

Once upon a time,

I got really, really, really sick.  Like for no reason at all.  Well, maybe it had to do with me being malnourished, but I was really sick for just a short time, so I concluded I was getting attacked.  By something from the spiritual realm.

BUT that's another story...hehe.

The point is, I was uber SICK.  I felt like crap, but I had to go to work and rehearse for a film I'm in etc.  And that night I was planning to go to an art show my friend's were going to display art work in.  I could have, and possibly should have just went home and rested.

But I had faith that I would get better, because I've learned God won't allow us to go through more suffering than we can handle. 

But God's behavior is a different story.

Anyway, the point is, I went to the show, and I got to listen to see some art work, paintings, photographs, all really nice stuff.  But listening to the live rock band playing that night made me feel better.  And the next day, listening to the GBC worship team practice for the service made me cured!  That, and ginger tea.


The point is, I had two options:

A) Back down from the threat of illness and accept defeat and wallow in sickness

B) Fight it, and have faith to be healed in due time


With a bunch of petitions to God to heal me and with other people's prayers, I was healed.

In the bigger scheme of things, standing up to challenges was something else I learned too.

I hope you gained something from reading this.  :)


peace,
gameovereasy

fearing forgiving fooling fun times.

I've never been more afraid in my life.  At least, I'm pretty sure I've never been as afraid as I was last night, meandering by way of Maunawili's ancient asphalt paths.  That place is super scary in the wee hours.

This is what I felt like.

It was four in the morning, and I had just gotten over a first and final night of summer fun with Sam at his house.  Without the lovely convenience of an automobile, I had the privilege of catching the bus to Waipahu to attend a church conference.  Having fun all night, I got no shut-eye, and thus gulped down a caffeine pill and some vitamin-b's for energy, read the Bible for endurance, and prayed to God for some encouragement.  

Just to put things into perspective, the weather had chilled from gusty-threatening to dead-silence, I was out of sorts from just pure exhaustion, and what Kili had said that night upon hearing my early bus-walking-to-catching-plan stuck with me: "Is that safe?  Walking around Maunawili at four in the morning?"  

I actually don't remember what he said.  But it was something that suggested anything could happen.

ARGUHHUH.

And serious kine, that Friday night, anything was up for grabs.  I was employed that evening to play at a wedding, that ended at a quarter until Seben&Seben o'clock.  After that, I had three options:

A) Go to youth service at Momilani
B) Go to a grad party at Ke'ehi Lagoon
C) Go to my friends house in Maunawili

 

And me being me I picked the last option.

 

Not to say it wasn't fun or anything.  It would've been easier to do the other things.

 

But I told myself that I would go to Sam's house to evangelize about Jesus.  Which I did not.  Really.  At least I tried.  And at least I got to see him before he left.

But I never want to walk in the dark again.

Sam lives deep inside Maunawili near the trail.  The nearest bus stop that was on the main road was like a mile away.  And inbetween Sam's house and that bus stop I had to get to at like 6 in the morning was a bunch of dark scary foresty area.

 

I was literally in the dark for over 20 minutes.  I was using my cell phone to light my way, which shone about 3 feet in front of me, and then utter blackness.

It was terrifying.

It was dark, I was tired, everything had that nighttime stillness going on, and all the sounds of late night Hawaiian native land areas were catapulting frequencies at my ears like crazy.  It was unnerving, and I expected like a undead menehune to jump out of nowhere and overtake me with a pua'a dragon at any moment.

There was absolute stillness.  And I felt uber uji.  There was just an uncomfortable feeling on me.  Like I was unwelcome walking there.

 

So I sang Christian songs.  And listened to my friend's voicemail like ten times.  Just so I had some sound in my ears rather than the rustling of ti leaves ominously waving 3 feet away from me.  Then I got to talk to Caiell and Patrick.  Thank God they answered their phones.

 

But yeah.  I couldn't have done that without God.  I had faith he was walking beside me the whole time.  Well, I prolly got doubtful, but still.  I was really scared. 

The scariest time in my whole life.  Scary times.

 

That's all folks! lol.

peace,

gameovereasy

I am I am I am me!

Sean-Joseph Takeo Kahaokalani Choo

was born to Malia-Ann 'Aiko' Puamae`ole Melim and John Kawika Choo on September 3, 1989.  Shy, quiet, reserved, meticulous, finicky, somewhat germaphobic, video-game-obsessed, and relatively musically-inclined are some terms one might use to describe his childhood mannerisms. 

From a young age, he had the uncanny ability to discern which string to push or pull to unravel knots. 

His grandfather, Peter Young Yil Choo, Jr. taught him how to piss people off by not saying anything until your grandmother is done yelling at her husband, and the beauty of martial arts and technology.

Sean's grandmother, Aileen Alayaay Daguman, taught him how to be a Filipino-Christian. 

Sean's other grandmother, Eloise Tsuru Kamamo Matsuno, taught him to not drink, smoke, gamble, and love people, especially Ben Cayetano and people running for office where you sit in an air-conditioned room that smells like old women's perfume, and help make campaign materials, and to love God. 

Sean's other grandfather, John James Keawekahaokalani Melim, taught him to stop crying when it's unnecessary or you'll get likens brah, and how to properly swing a golf club, and to love nature.

He graduated from Kamehameha Kaplama High School in 2007, and is currently attending Leeward Community College.  He plans to major in music, either in vocal performance of piano performance, and one day get a degree in Philosophy, Theology and Musical Theater.  His career goals entail being an actor, theater manager, musician, pastor, music director, worship leader, conservationist, and existential detective.

Profile

gameovereasy
gameovereasy

Latest Month

January 2009
S M T W T F S
    123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
Powered by LiveJournal.com
Designed by chasethestars